Wednesday, May 11th, Arch One

Wednesday, May 11th, Arch One
What a great night we had at Arch1 last night, an amazing crowd who were so up for laughs made it an absolute joy for our acts to bring the funnies. First to the mic was Andy Kyte. Now I’m starting to become a bit of a fanboy when it comes to Andy. Usually when an act say they are going to do some poetry, a bit inside me dies and longs for it to be a quick death. This so isn’t the case with Andy. From Gary’s Cheese Van and violent granmas to Gandhi and the eternal shame of the fat Controller’s bullies, Andy was the perfect start to the night. next was Elliott Cass. You may not know him yet, but if your kids study a foreign language, Elliot is the dude in the books pointing to the boulangerie. The gloriously batshit crazy Nicky Vere-Compton then had the room in absolute tears of laughter with her ‘admiration’ for all things moustache. Hot on Vicky’s heels we had Zach Marczika, who isn’t really a dog lover and reckons they need to up their game if they want provided for; rolling over just don’t cut it for him. After Zach was Olly Chalk, whom upon realising he is now older than Hendrix, Winehouse and Cobain is beginning to wonder if he’s just a late bloomer. Candace Bryan was next with tales of her truly progressive mother who was frankly way ahead of her time breaking the dysfunctional glass ceiling of the emotionally and physically absent patriarchy. Before our next act, Harrison Wright, got into the celebratory core of his set, he kicked things off with a short sketch where he tried to relive that most memorable of Oscar nights. Fortunately for him he was no Chris Rock. It was then over to Antonio Tcaci whose English over the last few years has drastically improved. When he first got to the UK he badly failed an exam…because he didn’t even know it was an exam! Amy Wright then confessed that she thinks she may have squandered her greatest chat-up asset by never having realised she was ever man’s Miss Wright. Closing the first half was Duffy Connors. After years of regular donations to the sperm bank, Duffy has come to the conclusion he might technically be a sex worker.
After the break we got off to a cracking start with the hilarious Tom Cousins. Not sure about where he’s recently moved to, Tom reckons Peckham might be the illegitimate child of Luton and downtown Aleppo. We then had Calum Macleod who thinks calling someone skinny is a bit tautologous as we’re all technically skinny…and occasionally hairy. It was then over to the brilliant Jack Short and the Tory’s new electoral bribe: guinea pigs for all! It was then over to a wonderful new face to G&B, the hilarious Serena Smart. I think it’s fair to say Serena left us all with a few things to think about, like just how many sips can the rim of a glass take before it gets worn and jaded? Joe Chambers was after Serena with everything from French primates to the most nightmarish Sex Ed teacher you could ever want at your school. It was then over to Mark Vincent and the trial and tribulations of the mature prostate and why one day The Spice Girls might become your backing track singers. Charlotte Latimer was after Mark with why a bobtail cat would be a vast improvement on Putin as the leader of Russia. After Charlotte was Craig Drewingham and the angst of the middle child of parents who wanted a girl. We still love ya, Claire! Closing the show was the incredible Donal Vaughan who brought us a bit of a mini preview of his Science and Magic show, which you can catch in Brighton and soon all across the country as he goes on tour. So what is the show about? Well, if you’ve ever wondered what pyrotechnics you could do with those cans of Lynx deodorant your nan gave you at Christmas, or how best to sharpen a vibrator in case of vampire infestation of your colostomy bag and what’s the best way to pull a table cloth from your head so not to end up with a face full of ‘apple juice’, then you simply can’t afford to miss Donal‘s show.
Well that was last night and it was the best possible way to end the G&B week. I didn’t stop laughing from start to finish. Well, with the possibility of a brief minute in the middle, maybe. Headlining next Wednesday at Arch1 we have the brilliantly bonkers Richard Woolford and the simply fabulous Katie McLeod. See you then.