Write-up by guest MC Martina O’Sullivan
We had a fan-tastic night at G&B Wednesdays at The Bell despite the air conditioning letting us down. Kicking off the show was Richard Wheatley who extolled the joys of nominative determinism. Next was Andrew Steel who told us that hurricanes with female names get taken less seriously by men – tell that to Hurricane Katrina. After Andrew was Kevin Collins who, in his youth, loved to dress like a trad wife. It was then over to Charlotte Imbert who pitched a genius idea for tampon technology worthy of investment on Dragons’ Den. Following Charlotte was Neil Benson who still brings his dirty clothes with him when he visits his mum. After all, she’s getting on so won’t have many more chances to do his washing. After Neil was Susan Heather Kitcatt who offered better car insurance advice than Martin Lewis. After Susan was Kris Singh, who made the rookie error of asking the host if he had time for a wee before getting on stage…so she brought him right on! It was Kris’s first time performing at G&B and he was notmistaken for being Tunisian. After that was Tom Popiolek, our first but not last barefoot performer, who look us through some mindful movement exercises. Our penultimate act was Aarian Mehrabani introduced us to the original gang warfare, not the Sharks vs. the Jets, but blind people vs. deaf people. Closing the first half was Tony Carr, who shared why it’s a bad idea to do a blood pressure check when you’re watching porn hub.
After the break we got off to a great start with the ever pun-derful Mark Rivlin. Mark called his first child Justin, because that’s exactly how he was conceived… Next up we had a delightful selection of G&B newbies, starting with divorcee Pery Machado who genuinely wishes couples across the world every unhappiness. Next was Zig Sandwich (Zig Sarnie), who recited a bladder full of poetry that took a moment to sink in. Our third newbie, Sam Lewis, tries to bond with his dad by sharing articles from the FT with him, though neither of them can get beyond their mutual paywall. After Sam was Kim Batty, our second barefoot-in-the-pub performer who took us on an unexpected behind-the-scenes tour of the Vatican. Next was Karen Cavenagh, who experienced a sexual awakening in a very strange place…Tunbridge Wells. After Karen was Sarah Power Sarah Power who, since moving to London has taken to screaming at random children. Our penultimate act was Sikandar Zaman. Sikander doesn’t why people don’t like Northerners since, which isn’t surprising as he’s Australian so pretty much everyone is Northern to him. Closing the show was Nick Morey, resplendent in violet. (pictured). Nick loves talking to his mum about the Traitors, not least as it’s a blessed relief from her talking about every single person who has ever wronged her.
And that was our G&B Wednesdays at The Bell. There will be no show at The Bell next Wednesday. Thursday night, though, is our G&B Pride Show at The Royal George!