We had a great night at The Albany last night! It all started with Declan Evanswho, depending on the day, can be a pricker of boils or boiler of pricks. After Declan was Munro Gascoigne. Mo says you haven’t lived till you’ve wifi-ed fruit into your mouth – at least it hasn’t been baked by a germy tiddler. Alex Lisztwan displayed his ability to look over toilet cubicle doors before Eli Hart (pictured) had us in stitches with Mario’s dilemma with Princess Peach: he’s only a plumber, and his business is now suffering. Alan Jay Byrne then expressed his joy at graduating from the gene puddle of Ireland to the gene pool of London – and London even has buses. After Alan was The Right Honorable Gentleman (Jon Wickham) whose silver spoon in his mouth only added iron(y) to his social commentary. Closing the first half was the inimitable Moss (@jameswatkins), who lured unsuspecting audience members into his birch trap, offered his latest DVD on nonstop wood, and made us wary of the contents of hamster cages everywhere.
Our second half kicked off with the fab Sally Firth (Siân Spry). Sally divides her time between cage fighting and slipping ketamine into the bottles of unsuspecting gym bunnies. Next up was Olive Bloom, who gave us the science of astrology and anal, before Gabriel E. Bowker took us on a journey of erotica fiction peppered with scintillating conversation about the Batmobile. Calum Piero Di Lieto then had his own version of erotica – a real-life BJ in a cemetery, which was more frightening than the corpses. After Calum was Mark Nicholas who gave us a demonstration on why autistic psychopaths could be a new answer to organized crime. Following Mark was Audaciously Maz who bemoans the state of affairs when you can’t even pick up an alkie in your local park anymore. We then had Declan Kennedy, aka our own Brexit Wolverine, who is beach body ready – just go back a few decades and add weaponry. Closing the show was the wonderful Laura Gómez, who is well prepared for her next romantic adventure, whether she’s carried out of a burning building (matches at the ready) or engaged in a sexy clay fight while crafting a teapot. After all, someone has to save her from the roaming Tories.
So that was our show! Join us next Tuesday at the Albany for our monthly Girlpower night, with an awesome line-up including headliners Jennifer Zheng and Sally Firth (aka Siân Spry).