What a night we had at the Bell! It was fun, friendly, with lots of laughs. First up was Keith Mendes, whose day job means he has to at least TRY and save people’s lives – even those who feel their time has come because they’ve sneezed out a spider. We then had Amber Phillips who, according to her auntie, entertains men via video – and even her family has seen the goods. Then Sobin ST (aka Sobin Sabu Thankachan, pictured) gave us the best pronouns to use if you’re hungry for attention: Look/At/Me. Ben Marciano found himself reassuring his mate that yes he’ll still drink water during dry January, before Joey Abels shared what his dad thinks of sunny early mornings: they’re brighter than his offspring. It was then over to Essam Aljaedy. Essam says God is with him – though sadly, God didn’t cut it as Essam’s chosen plus one. Closing the first half was the zany fabulousness of Katie Tweddle, whose bassoon has several tricks up its sleeve: panties for the gentlemen (our gay friends were not spared here), tunes on g-strings and even hiding escaping butt wind.
Our second half began with Paul Little, who has found a way to make sure chivalry is dead: when on a date, don’t put YOUR coat over that puddle. Alina Lew ( 劉韶卉 ) followed on from Paul – Alina wanted to shag Brad Pitt but, failing that, she discovered a handy tall oak tree in her local park. It was then time for a rap with Marcos Brito who was the first gay rapper in the 80s, giving us an awesome beat with lyrics that really were banging. It was then over to Steven Mayne. Steven has the perfect solution for those of us who struggle with family gatherings over the holidays – make sure you grab yourself an orphan. Helena Moody then shared her delight at having to explain MILF to a septuagenarian to get herself reinstated on TikTok, before Mani Ahmed explained why his parents chose Lahore, Pakistan over the UK in the 90s: they could handle racism here, but what did them in was the fish and chips. Closing our show was the wonderfully wacky Kim Hope. Kim loves the British Transport Police – they sort anything that appears unseemly, including bad fashion choices. However, for anything that looks OK but doesn’t feel right, you might need to sort this yourself – by putting your hands back in your lap.
So that was our night at the Bell! Join us next Wednesday 15th, when we’ll have a fabulous treat with the wonderful Johnny Murph and the simply brilliant Pete Kinsella.