Last night was our Growing Old Disgracefully show, and it was disgraceful in all the best possible ways – starting with Duncan Hart. Duncan says when you’re in the care of a medical professional who’s examining your ECG, the last words you want to hear are definitely not ‘well f*ck me!’ Ian Colyer followed on with the best endorsement of a school ever – you didn’t need consent forms to go on school trips, but you did need them to attend classes. We then had Marigold Lately who says she’s named after the flower rather than your mum’s favourite pair of gloves. Next up was @beckycheatle (pictured) who says she made the worst move of her career: going from male comedian to female comedian. Now she has to get used to being less funny. We then had Gee Watson who, in the spirit of the evening, declared getting older means his pronouns are now ‘was/were’. Closing the first half was the fabulous Tony Carr, who misses the good ol’ days when if you wanted someone to see your bits, you just had to dash out from behind the shrubbery. Plus before having kids, you could go get bladdered at your local – but now you gotta take ’em with you.
Our second half opened with Georgia Thorp. Georgia is not a fan of weddings – mostly because it’s apparently frowned upon if one of the bride’s outfits is straight from Mountain Warehouse. Following Georgia was Cameron Holder whose algorithm of hair loss ads and erectile dysfunction solutions gives him a daily Greg Wallace special. It was then over to Raj Kukadia, whose dad came to the UK from India where he then bought a shop – though his dad keeps it quiet, as it’s not on a corner. Maria Barbieri had some advice for the guys working out at the gym – work on your peripheral vision, please – before Chiff Powell shared his latest new love as he ages: his shoehorn. Closing the show was the wonderful Mark Vincent. Mark is always surprised when people present being born to a single mum as a feat – whose mum was able to share the labour? As the favourite child, Mark didn’t have to wear what his siblings did – like seatbelts.
So that was our show! Join us next Wednesday at The Bell Pub on July 23rd with the brilliant Stanislav Gunko and the fabulously funny Richard Wheatley.